It is said that nothing ever dies – it simply changes.  Maybe that’s true – but then what? Change???? Most people struggle deeply with the idea of change.  Companies have entire departments devoted to “managing change” so that employees can deal with it effectively. 

Resistance to change comes from a fear of the unknown or an expectation of loss. The first aspect of a person’s resistance to change is how they perceive the change. The second aspect is how well they are equipped to deal with the change they expect.

How much a person resists change is determined by whether they perceive the change as good or bad, and their expectations of how severe they expect the impact of the change to be on them. In order to ultimately accept change, we need to have adequate resilience and excellent coping skills.

However, not only is change inevitable, but it is required if you are to be successful in business and in life.  How can you ensure that when change is required, you handle it skillfully and with grace? Here are four tips for dealing with change when (not “if”) it comes into your life:

Ensure that you have a quality support system
It is so important during times of transition that you have a good support system around you. This could be family and friends, or a business mastermind group. Depending on the type of transition you are going through, different types of groups might prove to be more effective than others. It is imperative that you have some sort of mentor.

Look for the silver lining in the situation
Every cloud has a silver lining, as they say. Even if it appears that the world is falling down around your ears. Take some time and look at the situation. See what can be found that is positive. For example, even if you lose a job, perhaps that job wasn’t the best fit for you and now you are free to pursue a long-lost dream or some other opportunity that will make you much happier.

Continue your spiritual practice
This is not the time to quit praying, meditating, journaling or doing whatever it is that centers you and brings you peace and serenity. If you don’t already have a daily spiritual practice, then please start something before you find that you need it! It could be something as simple as taking five minutes each morning before you get out of bed to quiet your mind, breathe deeply and review your plan for the day; or write whatever comes to mind in your journal for 10 or 15 minutes each morning or evening. Just five to ten minutes each day will provide you enough peace of mind to get through any of these obstacles, with at least some amount of grace.

Create a structure to support you
When all else is failing or seemingly In chaos around you, it is important to have a structure to cling to. This can mean having a simple daily routine that you keep to each day. For example, getting up, meditating, having breakfast, etc. at the same time each morning. In the evening, spend a few minutes relaxing before eating dinner and settling in for bed. Whatever your routine is, stick to it! This will provide an important framework and touchstone amidst the change and confusion that may be going on externally.

As you can see, while change may be inevitable, it doesn’t have to be traumatic. Keep your life as simple and structured as possible, with downtime and spiritual connection included and you will find that “This too shall pass” – you will soon be acclimated to the change that has occurred and it will be smooth sailing from here on out!

This article was written by Patricia Selmo, an ordained Interfaith Minister, certified life coach, spiritual healer, teacher and guide. She is the co-founder of the International Association of Women Spiritual Leaders: www.iawsl.com.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You may, as long as you commit to leave all of the links active, do not edit the article in any way, and include the following byline: The International Association of Women Spiritual Leaders was founded to support spiritual women in living abundantly while serving their unique missions. We invite you to download-as our GIFT to you-the 5 Secrets to Creating Abundance Through Your Purpose. You will also be registered to receive our weekly newsletter full of information and tips for supporting you in your calling. Just click here: www.iawsl.com

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Join us as we interview Diane Musho Hamilton

July 9, 2010 3 PM Eastern/2 PM Central/1 PM Mountain/12 PM Pacific

Diane Musho Hamilton is a gifted facilitator, mediator, and spiritual teacher. She is a core founder of iEvolve: Global Practice Community and a co-director of Integral Life Spiritual Center. Diane is a fully ordained Zen priest and teacher. She has studied Buddhism since 1984, and was given dharma transmission by her Zen master, Genpo Roshi, in 2006. She is well known as an innovator in facilitating group dialogues, especially controversial conversations about culture, religion, race and gender relations.

For her, Zen practice is a fundamental commitment to experiencing reality as it is – beautiful, ungraspable and seamless, nothing other than your own life. It is also a practice in fearlessness, in compassion, and in seeing the wisdom in all situations and greeting them with a joyous mind.

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Woman Spiritual Leader – the term sounds very impressive and well, somehow, larger than life. Many women would look at that phrase and say, “that’s not me!” Mother Theresa is a Woman Spiritual Leader, not me. Marianne Williamson is a Woman Spiritual Leader, not me!

But, I would beg to differ. I think that most women are spiritual leaders. Hear me out for a minute. Let’s delve into the individual definitions of each of the words that make up this term. First of all, what is meant by the word “leader”?

A leader is someone with a vision, who sees a direction and pursues it. A leader wants to create change in the world or in the community or even just in their home. A leader sees an opportunity for improvement and takes steps towards achieving that change no matter how small; and people who resonate with that change, follow.

Most spiritual leaders don’t have specialized training in spiritual leadership. They could, but it’s not a requirement.

Many times names like Eleanor Roosevelt, Margaret Thatcher and Indira Ghandi come up as names of Leaders. But a leader doesn’t have to be known all over the world or even in their own country. A leader is known to the people they have influence on. For most of us, that is our family, friends and community, and clients or customers if we have them.

Who do you have influence on? Who do you connect with on a daily or even just monthly basis? What areas of influence to you desire to improve? Your home? Your business? Your client’s lives? Your community?

If you named even one area you have influence on, and a “vision” for how you would like that area to be, you have the makings of a leader!

Next, let’s take a look at the word “Spiritual”. Now we can go a lot of different directions with this one. Some people would think this implies only very religious people. Others would think the opposite, that it is a “New-agey” term implying no religion, but some other metaphysical concept. I would like to propose that it encompasses both of these terms and many things in between.

For this discussion, I am proposing that “spiritual” means – anything that describes the desire for humans to connect to a force greater than themselves.

Do you believe in something larger than yourself? God? Allah?

Your Higher Self? The Force? The Universe?

Do you have a desire to connect with this Source in the manner best suited to you?

Would you like to add more meaning to your business and personal life?

If you answered yes to any of these questions and determined a sphere of influence you have “vision” of improving in some way – or making a difference in some way, then YOU are a SPIRITUAL LEADER!!! And, of course, it goes without saying that if you are a spiritual leader AND a woman, then you are a WOMAN SPIRITUAL LEADER!

This article was written by Patricia Selmo, an Interfaith seminarian, certified life coach, spiritual healer, teacher and guide. She is the co-founder of the International Association of Women Spiritual Leaders: www.iawsl.com.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You may, as long as you commit to leave all of the links active, do not edit the article in any way, and include the following byline: The International Association of Women Spiritual Leaders was founded to support spiritual women in living abundantly while serving their unique missions. We invite you to download-as our GIFT to you-the 5 Secrets to Creating Abundance Through Your Calling. You will also be registered to receive our weekly newsletter full of information and tips for supporting you in your calling. Just click here: www.iawsl.com

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June 15, 2010    6 PM Eastern/5 PM Central/4 PM Mountain/3 PM Pacific

Karen Lamark Wilson is the CEO of Just Energy Enterprises, Inc. and the president and founder of the International Association of Intuitive Entrepreneurs.

Karen will be discussing the emergence of the feminine in the world today and how important this energy is in your business and your life. She will also be offering a very generous *free* gift at the end of the call.

Under the same corporate umbrella she is also the owner of a high-level education/consulting company, Heart of Courage Coaching. Karen is fully engaged in the new Conceptual Age as a business woman, educator, author, poet, and dynamic speaker. She is also an internationally known spiritual teacher and energy healer.

She founded IAIE to help the outer world reclaim and cultivate direct inner knowing and expanded consciousness as the vibrant inheritance of balanced wisdom that’s ready to flow into leadership today. Karen has two grown children and lives in Paradise Valley, Arizona with her wonder dog, Koko, a furry white American Eskimo.

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Painting by Marica S. Lauck & Deborah Koff-Chapin

How often have you been in the middle of a dilemma – unable to decide which direction to go in, which step to take next? How to choose?  Every day we are confronted with decisions to make – some big, some small. How do you decide? You could make a list of pros and cons, you could ask your neighbor what you should do, or you can follow a Higher Power that has your best interests at heart.

There is a perfect GPS for guiding you through your life and you have access to it at all times. It goes by many names – intuition, gut feeling, higher self. It can also be “externally” directed such as – God, Allah, guardian angel, or spirit guide.

It really doesn’t matter which if these you relate to and choose to you, the methods and techniques for hearing it are the same. Below are several techniques for gaining access to this important tool in your business toolbox.

Technique #1: Get quiet
Sit quietly in meditation or just silently a few minutes each day. Just taking the time to do this, can open up the sensitivity needed to “hear” the guidance you are seeking.

Technique #2: Clear clutter
This can mean physical clutter, such as in your home or office space, but it can also mean mental clutter or time wasters. Get rid of any menial jobs or tasks that can be done by someone else, or perhaps don’t need to be done at all. Guidance needs space to work; and you need space to hear it.

Technique #3: Journal
Keep a daily journal of concerns and questions. Ask questions of your intuition in Q&A format and see what comes to you.

Technique #4: Play
Do something fun that you don’t normally do – plant a flower, go for a hike, play tag with your kids. Doing fun, playful things can disengage the mental chatter that goes on and again, create the space required for the messages to come through.

Once you have received some information, it is very important to validate it. You need to be sure it is coming from this all-knowing source and not from your own mind or ego with all of its wishes, wants, and desires. Here are a few guidelines to help you determine if this is a valid message:

1.    It is not fear-based – If you get a feeling of fear from the message, it most likely is NOT valid; if you feel peaceful about the message (even though it might provoke some anxiety), it most likely is valid.

2.    “I” versus “You” language – The message came across in the second person. For example, “You need to take the job offer.” versus “I want to take the job offer.”

3.    Declarative language – The message came in declarative, strong language – not in weak, unsure language. For example, “You need to take the job offer” versus “Maybe you should take the job.”

4.    Surprising – this was not the message you “expected” to hear. If you went into the process expecting to hear a particular message and that’s not the one you heard, it is a good indicator that this is a valid message.

Please note that some of these indicators may or may not be present. The more of them you have, the more likely the message is valid. However, the most important one is the first one – if this one is not present, the odds of the message being valid are pretty slim. God or intuition does not operate using fear-based principles. You will be guided through a feeling of peace – not through fear.

Remember to take advantage of this readily-accessible system for guiding your business and your life through anything that comes your way.

This article was written by Patricia Selmo, an Interfaith seminarian, certified life coach, spiritual healer, teacher and guide. She is the co-founder of the International Association of Women Spiritual Leaders: www.iawsl.com.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You may, as long as you commit to leave all of the links active, do not edit the article in any way, and include the following byline: The International Association of Women Spiritual Leaders was founded to support spiritual women in living abundantly while serving their unique missions. We invite you to download-as our GIFT to you-the 5 Secrets to Creating Abundance Through Your Calling. You will also be registered to receive our weekly newsletter full of information and tips for supporting you in your calling. Just click here: www.iawsl.com

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I am frustratingly late getting this article written this week due to a knock-down, drag-out fight with my body’s needs…  Guess who won?

My recent sailing trip to the British Virgin Islands, though beautiful and thoroughly enjoyable, was fraught with emotional and physical challenges.  When I arrived home, my physicality went into dive mode, but true to form, my ego went into overdrive.  You know what it’s like to come home from being away for eleven days; a million emails, tons of voice mail messages, clients needing attention… yesterday.  And what about the empty refrigerator and the full laundry hamper?!  Not the least, family and friends who want to hear about the trip and get “caught up”.

Well, it took about one week of meeting the demands that I and others had put on me; then somebody pulled the plug.  I couldn’t even talk this week due to a “cold” that crash landed into laryngitis and rasping bronchi.  And have I been sleeping?  You bet!       

So what does all of this have to do with this week’s article?  I posted a note on ‘Facebook’ this morning that one of my favorite expressions is, “We teach what we need to learn”, and I obviously need to learn much more about self care, ergo the subject of this article.

The subject is a timely one in that we are interviewing Jennifer Louden who is the “Comfort Queen”.  In preparation for the interview, I navigated her web site and read some of her material posted there.  Did it hit home!!

Jennifer states in a recent blog; “Women at my retreats who have these amazing lives, filled with family and love and good work and creativity, but they are too often chewing away at what they haven’t done, looking at what isn’t satisfied… What breaks my heart the most is that life is spilling away while we look elsewhere”.

And in the quest for excellence, for fulfilling our purpose (whatever we think that is), or starting/growing a business, a spiritual practice, for writing the book, for serving more clients, and for romancing the dream; we often forget about the here and now, what we have accomplished, and to take care of ourselves.  Just what does that mean?

Well, we know it can mean different things to different women.  To me it means:

•    Resting when I am tired, and sleeping at least seven hours a night
•    Eating food that I know is healthy for me, hydrating, and being aware of how much alcohol I consume
•    Swimming with the team at practice, working out, and fast walking for exercise
•    Making time early in the morning and during the day for my spiritual practice
•    Managing my time, delegating when I can, and saying “no” when I already have too much on the agenda
•    Spending quality time with my families and friends
•    Precious time for reading

One thing I have forgotten somewhere on the journey to adulthood is how to play.  Anyone out there who remembers how to do that?  I sure could use some help!
You may have noticed, it is missing from my “self care” list…

If you were to care for yourself… just for yourself (never mind all of the others who depend on you) what would that look like?  I know you are immersed in all of the important items that need your attention, but would you take just 20 minutes to get quiet, be alone, and let your imagination run wild with what you need to do to nurture yourself?

I would be interested to hear about some of your self nurturing “cannot do withouts”.
Please respond on our blog or Facebook, and let’s see if we can get some dialogue going around our “favorites for self care”.

Love and Blessings!

Rev. Ruth

Ruth Reiner is an ordained minister in the Interfaith tradition, Spiritual Counselor, Certified Coach, Nurse, and successful entrepreneur.  She has two adult daughters with families/four grandchildren.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE, PUBLICATION, OR ON YOUR WEB-SITE? You may, as long as you commit to leaving the entire article intact, do not alter it in any way, and include the following: “THE INTERNATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF WOMEN SPIRITUAL LEADERS” was founded to support spiritual women in living abundantly while serving their unique missions. We invite you to download – as a gift to you- THE 5 SECRETS TO CREATING ABUNDANCE THROUGH YOUR CALLING.
You will also be registered to receive our weekly newsletter full of tips and information for supporting you in your mission or quest.

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Join us as we interview Jennifer and discuss what
self-care for the Woman Spiritual Leader means.

May 14, 2010 2 PM Eastern/1 PM Central/12 PM Mountain/11 AM Pacific

Jennifer Louden is the best-selling author of The Woman’s Comfort Book, The Couple’s Comfort Book, The Pregnant Woman’s Comfort Book, The Woman’s Retreat Book, and Comfort Secrets for Busy Women. She is both a personal coach and social commentator, who has taken the concept of “comfort” and self-care, and made these essential concepts irresistible and essential to women around the world. Jennifer is a cultural visionary, harnessing her extraordinary ability to recognize women’s comfort as both a fundamental need and an innate desire.

As women’s roles and voices have evolved, so has Jennifer’s mission, transforming from a well-read self-help author to a cultural leader and life guide, inspiring women to develop their own recipe for emotional, physical, spiritual and work-life balance. With Jennifer’s prompting, women are encouraged to find their personal truths, to explore and unearth their purposes in life, purposes that resonate most authentically with their innate wisdom, creating the truest comfort of all.

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This is a gorgeous chant to the Divine Mother – I have been listening to it all week! I wanted to share it here and honor all of the mothers out there! Enjoy!

Love you all!

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Carole Hart will be discussing her ground-breaking film,
“For the Next 7 Generations”

May 7, 2010    2:30 PM Eastern/1:30 PM Central/12:30 PM Mountain/11:30 PM Pacific

For the Next 7 Generations documents the momentous journey of 13 Indigenous Grandmothers, as they travel around the globe to promote world peace and share their indigenous ways of healing.  Originating from all four corners, these 13 wise women elders, shamans and medicine women, first came together in 2004 at a historic gathering in Upstate New York.  Motivated by their concern for our planet, they decided to form an alliance: The International Council of 13 Indigenous Grandmothers. The film begins at their first gathering follows them to the Amazon rainforest, the mountains of Mexico, throughout North America, and to Dharamsala, India, for a private meeting with the Dalai Lama.  Facing a world in crisis, the Grandmothers share with us their visions of healing and a call for change now, before it’s too late. Through their teachings, they are lighting a way to a peaceful, sustainable planet.

Since the film’s completion in September of 2009 it has been selected for eight festivals, including The Santa Fe Film Festival, where it was nominated for Best Indigenous Documentary. It also won awards for Best of the Festival and Best Documentary at the First Annual Big Island Talking Circle Film Festival in Hilo Hawaii. After working together for five years, the Grandmothers have established a worldwide presence. In 2006 a book about them titled, “Grandmothers Council the World” was published, and has been translated into nine languages.

Don’t miss this opportunity to hear about the making
and the message of this film from the filmmaker herself.

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How often do I use the word “lead” or “leadership” without really thinking about its meaning?  It’s a valid question considering that the organization which I represent, “The International Association of Women Spiritual Leaders” deals with leadership on many levels.
When I initially thought about the subject for this article, it was the word leadership upon which I would focus.  Well, I didn’t get much help from ‘Merriam’, ‘Random’, or ‘Google’ relative to the ‘true meaning’ of the word.  I was ‘led’ to the phrase, ‘to lead’ which has a plethora of meanings:

• To show the way to by going in advance
• To guide or direct in a course
• To serve as a route for; to take
• To be a channel or conduit for
• To guide the behavior or opinion of: induce
• To direct the performance or activities of
• To inspire the conduct of
• To play a principal or guiding role in
• To go or be at the head of; to be ahead of
• To be foremost in or among; to be first
• To act as a commander, director, or guide (leader)

We all know women who spring to mind immediately, as we scan the above list.  I thought of Joan of Arc, Theresa of Avila, Mary, the mother of Jesus, Rabi’a, Eleanor Roosevelt, Aung San Suu Kyi, Indira Ghandi, Golda Meir, and women I have known and worked with, to name a few.  I am curious to know who came to mind for you as you read the above meanings.

Native American Artwork by Susan Seddon Boulet "The Shaman"

Seth Godin, in his book, Tribe, describes Meghan McDonald, whom he calls the world’s best coach… “ hardly awe-inspiring.  Mostly, she just talks quietly, one on one, to someone who needs to hear from her.  Over the course of a few hours, Meghan will have dozens of conversations like that.  She occasionally talks to the entire team, but she never raises her voice.  No one cries, no one is belittled, no one is bullied.

After a few weeks, amazing things start to happen.  The members of the team start coaching each other.  A ten-year-old novice offers a pointer to a veteran recently back from the national competition.  Meghan leaves the building, and practice continues.

Sports analogies rarely work for me.  They’re too unrealistic, too testosterone filled for the real world.  Meghan, however, isn’t just a coach.  She’s someone who understands authentic leadership, and she realizes what it means to create a tribe.

She doesn’t lead the way other people lead.  And that’s fine, because there isn’t a right technique, a proven tactic, a right way and a wrong way.  Deciding to lead, not manage is the critical choice.  Meghan connects and inspires.  She doesn’t manage.” (italics, mine).

I so agree with Seth’s last few sentences.  There are many ways to lead; many methods, techniques, and tactics are employed by good leaders.  The common threads, in my opinion, that are evident in them all are humility, the ability to inspire, an authentic connection with their followers (or “tribe”, as Seth calls them), generosity, willingness to serve, and a thorn in their side re: the status quo.

His Holiness, The Dali Lama, during sessions at the Vancouver Peace Summit in 2009 was quoted as saying, “The world will be saved by the Western women”.  He was also quoted during the same conference:

“Some people may call me a feminist… but we need more effort to promote basic human values–human compassion, human affection.  And in that respect females have more sensitivity to others’ pain and suffering.”

In my opinion, the time has come for women to assume the role of leader with all of the attributes described.  The world, our countries, our communities, our institutions, our families, and, yes, our “tribes” are counting on us!

Love and Blessings!

Ruth

This article was written by Rev. Ruth Reiner, an ordained Interfaith minister, spiritual counselor, certified life and relationship coach, registered professional nurse, and successful entrepreneur.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE, PUBLICATION, OR ON YOUR WEB-SITE? You may, as long as you commit to leaving the entire article intact, do not alter it in any way, and include the following: “THE INTERNATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF WOMEN SPIRITUAL LEADERS” was founded to support spiritual women in living abundantly while serving their unique missions. We invite you to download – as a gift to you- THE 5 SECRETS TO CREATING ABUNDANCE THROUGH YOUR CALLING.
You will also be registered to receive our weekly newsletter full of tips and information for supporting you in your mission or quest.

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